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Warning Signs Of An Unfaithful Mate And Exactly How They Differ From Signs Of Infidelity
Is cheating very different from infidelity?
Yes, I believe so. Signs of a cheating spouse will be totally different from signs of infidelity.
In talking to thousands of individuals embroiled with a cheating spouse or infidelity over the past two plus decades, I've noticed a difference. In our society the word cheating carries a different meaning than infidelity.
This is important for an individual discerning the signs of a cheating lover or the signs of infidelity. A person who "cheats" is different from someone who is involved with "infidelity."
Cheating is most closely described in my e-book as an individual who "Doesn't Want to Say No." This is only one of 7 kinds of affairs. The other six kinds of affairs lean much more in the direction of infidelity.
The true cheater is really a rather rare bird, but is probably most glamorized and comes closest to our stereotype of cheating or infidelity.
Infidelity, on the whole, is marked by confusion, pain, doubt, ambivalence and a period of craziness in the person's life.
Cheating is an ongoing lifestyle.
Here are some signs of a cheating spouse:
1. There most likely will be more than one other individual. He sees affairs as conquests, generally sexual, and not as a place to find intimacy.
Actually he lacks quite a few of the tools and the mind set to have intimate relationships. He probably will move from one conquest to another. His gratification on a basic level remains primary.
2. He will have little internal conflict about the affair. This can be different markedly from the individual who can't say no. Your spouse will view the affair or affairs as entitlement.
He believes he deserves them. He deserves to be adored. He should have excitement and personal gratification in his life. He has earned it. There is nothing wrong with this. Actually others, perhaps you included, ought to realize this!
3. He will operate inside a world that supports his illusion and behavior. He will surround himself with those who look the other way or essentially encourage his philandering behavior. You will not find yourself accepted in this world. He and his colleagues and friends collude to maintain their world.
4. You might run into a problem with the other individual or persons. Don't forget the movie, Fatal Attraction? The other person might attach herself to him with certain expectations to be cared for and she may possibly be married also.
It is perhaps part of his strategy in his conquest efforts. When she is "dumped" or the expectations don't materialize she may possibly pursue revenge. You might be involved.
5. You may not experience lots of conflict with him. There is no talk of divorce. Your life may possibly be fairly copacetic, unless you rock the boat. He has his playtime and you fill another specific role of quiet support. Keep the balance and life will move along fairly seamlessly.
6. There's one problem, however. There is the concern of aging. Depending on his social context, you might turn into a liability as you increasingly fail to project a young attractive vibrant image.
He wants those around him to reflect back attractiveness and perfection. In the event you fail in this regard you may be cast aside. Part of this depends on the financial cost of this sort of "trade-in."
7. His fragile, unrealistic world and yours could crumble if he encounters failure. Failure is his "Achilles heel." Unfortunately, the distortion and illusion he lives under do not generally coincide with reality.
He presses and bends the rules to his advantage. He may not pay close attention to the repercussions of his behavior.
Those consequences being legal, financial or health may possibly bite him at some point. He most likely will count on you to be there for him, to cry on your shoulder to help him restore his confidence.
In case you suspect your significant other is cheating or feel something isn't right in your relationship, there are other approaches you can spot a player or spot a cheater. All you have to do is get guidance on how to find out, simply by searching, "cheatersmenplayers".
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